The Sleep Over.

24-01-11

Scott slept over last night.

Both Jack and Scott have been driving their parents crazy about it since it was planned. Scott had been with his grandmother all day. When they got home from their activity Scott started asking when his mother was coming to get him. This carried on for a couple of hour before Jane, Scott's mother, arrived. They explained that he'd been asking for her and they didn't know what was wrong. Communication isn't one of Scott's strengths. Jane called for Scott interested to hear about what was wrong, when Scott ran up to her he asked, Are we going to Jack's now?

Jack had been asking about Scott's arrival for days. Every day we'd had constant, Is Scott coming to stay today? When I wake up in the morning will Scott be here? Is Scott coming after this day? Strangely, the day that Scott was actually due to arrive he was pretty quiet about the subject.

After Scott arrived Jack started started his trademarked toy tour. Scott has been over to our house a number of times and has seen the toys, it's real easy to tell what Scott is thinking by the expression on his face. He wasn't impressed.

Jack is a gracious host, patient and accomodating. He went to length in making sure Scott was entertained and felt comfortable.

Scott, I have a bed but it's not big enough for both of us. So we're going to be sleeping in the spare room which is really big. Now I know you're afraid of the dark so don't worry, I'll be with you and I've got a torch.

They first spent time comparing who'd been excited about the sleep over for the longest. Jack won with having been excited since he was last in America. Jack tried to initiate a game of hide and seek but Scott didn't go for it. So finally Jack settled with instructing him how to play Bakugan. Each conversation seemed to end up in name calling. You look like a head, well you look like a shoulder, you look like a arm, you look like a bum etc... etc... Neither are very good at name calling.

Overall they mostly played with Jack's extensive Ben10 collection. Scott's only recently become aware of Ben10 and was very interested to watch the shows and see all the aliens that he'd not yet heard about. Jack showed of and gave a details description of each alien and even helped narrate one of the episodes.


Bedtime was simple enough, they took a bath that was fill with more toys than water then Helen handled Scott and I handled Jack as we got them into their jammies. They agreed on a story and both cuddled up to Helen for the reading, clutching their chosen Ben10 figures.

The giggled and chatted upstairs. They did eventually get to sleep. It was a couple hours past bed time but it was surprisingly easy. After a couple of quick discussions they eventually just, went to sleep...

The only hitch that we had was at 3am whem Scott woke up and didn't know where he was. He called for mommy until Helen was able to wake him up enough to remind him where he was. After about 30 minutes he was asleep again.

Reading The Gruffalo at bedtime.

In the morning there was breakfast and more Ben10 then Scott left after lunch.

Both boys are exhausted but agreed that they'd had a really good time and are eager to plan the next sleep over.

No Best Friend

21-01-11

Jack was off school today so he spent the day with Helen. They planned to do all the usual things, lunch at McDonalds and then off to the soft play area. Early in the morning Helen received word that many of the children from Jack's school were going to the same soft play area but in the morning rather than the afternoon. This presented a slight problem for Helen, she had other things planned for the morning. None of them were set in concrete so she put it to Jack, would he like to go to the play place in the morning with the kids from school, or in the afternoon as usual.
Jack's first condition was that he wanted to go when Phoebe was going, so Helen go in touch with Phoebe's parents and discovered that Phoebe wasn't going this time. So it was put to Jack again, go with those from School, or potentially on his own. Jack's response was truly heartbreaking.


I don't want to go with the kids from school. None of them will want to play with me.

Knowing that Phoebe now wasn't going and that Scott was ill Jack was more than likely to be on his own. He still preferred to go in the afternoon in anticipation that he would be spending the time playing by himself anyway. Visions of Jack at school playing by himself all day shot through Helen's mind. She was going to have to speak to Mrs. Smith. What would she even say? Jack has occasionally mentioned when a regular playmate would start favoring another over him but usually someone else came along shortly after. It's never really occurred to us how this might have made him feel. We hear more from Jack about what he eats and with whom he plays than what he actually do at school, or how he feels about it. After a bit of gentle probing Helen got a little more information. By the end of the conversation Jack was sobbing inconsolably.

Each of the children at Jack's school have a best friend. Amberleigh has Sophie, Mia has Alfie and so on. Jack doesn't have a best friend. For a while he had Izzy but she's not able to go anymore. He has no trouble getting the kids to play with him but it's always him and them. If he decides to play with something else, the decision is his alone. He's aware of this and it makes him very sad. The bottom line is our son feels alone in parts of his world and there's not a lot that we can do about it. Sadly it will remain this way until a best friend appears.

This afternoon Jack went to the play place and played with Tom and little sister Amy. Jack and Tom get along well and aside from a hitting incident, Jack had a really great time and didn't want to come home.